Penniyam potrudhum

There is an algorithm used to find perfect match. Age, gothra, star and horoscope should match. If you succeed in first round ,round two begins. The status,salary,height and weight should match. Education should be either equal or the girl should be less than boy . The actual interview begins only after this. The first round is phonic interview, the next, one-on-one and the last is group interview with family. Matrimonial concepts combine two extreme concepts. Old institutions are updated with new concepts,ideas and technology. Arranged marriage is a patriarchal set up for union of relatives and family. Caste hierarchy, gender Privealage, class division are given importance than romantic relationships. Matrimonial websites first appeared in India in 1996. The life partners are shortlisted based on India's myths and stereotypes using new technologies . Every one in matrimony in search of a perfect life partner,and yet,most were disappointed. Divorcees,widows and widowers face stigm...

A remarkable importance is given to home cooked food; modernization, urbanization,convenience does not count. Food is considered as secret to bond between husband and in-laws. ' 'The family that eats together,stays together' refers to home cooked food in India. Women and kitchen are inseparable in  India. Infact, a women's pride and efficiency lies in her cooking skills. A women may be Doctor, engineer, astronaut, but still the prestige of a family lies in women's cooking skills. Cooking is an art and I don't know how people expect each and everyone of a gender should be interested in it; even expected to master. Cooking is a life skill everyone should learn, irrespective of gender. But how come very women can become an expert in it. Let each and every man and woman learn cooking for a basic level. If some one is so much interested let them master the art. Why should people shame women who cooks average?.                      ...

Most girls and women are still defined by word "marriage". Marriage is the bench mark every women should undergo before certain age. This pressure to get married at young age makes Indian women to leave work force.  Marriage comes with it's own set of  responsibilities of domestic chores, child bearing and rearing,elder care etc. Yesterday's traditional conservative value system and today's liberal value system create conflicts in  women's life. Women demand self respect, self esteem, value and rights. This creates conflicts in families. Men,on the other hand,does not know how to handle their life partner. They are confused by their mother's conservative views and wife's modern views. They end up hurting their wife. A women refuses to accept unfair treatment from husband and in-laws.  Women are encouraged to work. The women's job and salary has become a talking point even in arranged marriage set ups. Matrimonial classified ads,which is the reflec...

Women are believed to lack business skills. Business people are expected to have sons for business lineage. The patriarchal set up of  women leaving her natal home and living in her husband's home have created a havoc in women's business dreams. Women are let to work,not encouraged for business. People fear that it may create a disturbance in finding a good life partner. Even for men,business is encouraged only in business communities. People fear no proofs can be shown for prospective brides / bride grooms. In case of working, the identity cards,Income tax returns and salary certificates exists as valid proof. We all might have seen many company's name as x & brothers, y & sons. Where are companies in the name of x & sisters or z & daughters. Why can't daughters do business with their father or mother?  Is the question in my mind. Why sons are considered as business heir?.  Even in well established businesses , only sons inherit businesses and are expe...

Indians are so obsessed with foreign countries. The idea of working abroad is hammered into each and every man's house. On the other hand, women are often discouraged from foreign education and overseas job . An NRI groom is considered as a boon for india women folk. Many women move to foreign in dependent visas. They are not eligible to work or study in H4 visa. They end up as home makers. In India, a women can attend courses or skill development classes and move to work force. In us/Canada/ gulf countries a women cannot afford education due to high cost of education and cost of living. Even if an NRI women undergoes a course, there is no sure way of getting a job. A person should be skillful and impress a employer to sponsor his visa. The cost of domestic burns a hole in pocket. A middle class cannot afford maid and women end up doing all household chores. They juggle between cooking, cleaning and baby sitting. An NRI Indian will not be willing to do household chores. An NRI wom...

Women are considered as a man's possession. So much importance given to women's virginity.  If you think virginity testing not done on recent time. Then, you are wrong. The kanjarbhat community, around 50,000 people, still follow virginity testing. Located in pimpar chinchwad,this community Is an educated community. Each girl belonging to this community have to follow the virginity testing on the day of her marriage. A white bedsheet is offered to girl and village heads and family members wait outside the room. All sharp objects will be removed from the room. Even glass bangles are not allowed, or often counted.The girl have to show blood shed bedsheet. If there is no blood stains, the girl is considered as impure. The new bride is beaten and even marriage is consummated. A new bride is even expected to undergo agni pariksha. She needs to hold a hot iron rod and need to walk few distance. She might be even immersed under water for 100 counts.  Why a couple should have sex on ...